I know you're prolly super busy, but I'm in need of a tangent and distraction. I need loud noise hour back in my life, and I could use a little more pessimism, negativity and overall judgment in my lifestyle.
Rember* CIS class, and all the stupid things we thought we'd never need to use again?
Yeah, I'm using them pretty much daily... things like IF statements and VLOOKUPs, and starting to contemplate the uselessness of much of my education that I'll begin paying for shortly.
Dear Professor of Computer Information Systems,
I used to sleep through your class because you have a monotone voice. Apparently your lectures subconsciously entered my brain.
Check out the nested if statement below and proceed to suck it.
=IF(H4<=5,"5 or less days",IF(H4<=10,"10-15 days", IF(H4<=15,"11-15 days", IF(H4<=20,"16 - 20 Days",IF(H4<=25,"21 - 25 days","25 days or more")))))
Thanks for the C-! That was really helpful and didn't hurt my GPA or fun at all. I'm glad frat boys and athletes got As in your class because they had your exams and excuses to skip classes.
Regards,
Pessimistic D. Penelope
CIS MASTER
P.S. You look like a frog and everyone in my class thought you were a spy. Enjoy your spaghetti. I will be willing to accept a refund in the amount of $40,000 for the time I wasted in your classroom (this is a fairly reasonable rate considering inflation, tuition, interest, and the current state of the economy.
*yes, I spelled it like this on purpose, it's going to be added to the list
No comments:
Post a Comment